Thursday, September 24, 2009
Beyonce to headline at Singapore F1
SINGAPORE -- Some of the world's hottest music acts will go full throttle to entertain Formula One's glamour set this weekend as Singapore works to build on the success of its inaugural Grand Prix.
Last year's race was a sell-out but in tough economic times ticket sales this year have been slower.
To boost the off-track experience and pull in punters, organizers have spent big on a star-laden party.
Superstar Beyonce headlines the three-day F1 Rocks Singapore festival at Fort Canning Park, also featuring No Doubt, Black Eyed Peas, Travis, Simple Minds, ZZ Top and Chaka Khan.
Hollywood starlet and paparazzi magnet Lindsay Lohan will host the event, local reports said.
She stepped in after Pussycat Dolls' Nicole Scherzinger pulled out after reportedly splitting with her driver boyfriend Lewis Hamilton.
Inside the Marina Bay street circuit, the Backstreet Boys and a host of top deejays, led by John Digweed, will keep the music pumping long after the Formula One cars have driven back to the pits.
The drivers have their own exclusive party at the Official Formula 1 Lounge, hosted by European socialite and TV presenter Tamara Ecclestone, F1 supremo Bernie Ecclestone's daughter.
Tickets are being sold at a hefty 500 Singapore dollars (US$354) per person, or US$12,000 for a VIP table.
“It's about time Singapore had a taste of real Grand Prix glamour and The Official Formula 1 Lounge will enhance the overall appeal of our night race,” said Michel Lu, director of the Stereolab dance club that is hosting the event.
Singapore is heavily reliant on tourism and events like the Grand Prix are part of its strategy to boost revenues.
Last year, overseas tourists in town for the race chalked up a total of 168 million Singapore dollars (US$119 million) in receipts, according to The Straits Times.
source:www.chinapost.com
50 Pinoy Signs and Spoofs
50 Pinoy Signs and Spoofs
The Filipinos’ propensity for spoofs of popular signs shows no sign of abating. Pinoy humor, even in the most difficult situations always worms its way, and usually ends up softening the impact of what could otherwise be a bad situation.
That is typically Filipino. After all, we are not known as one of the happiest people in the world for nothing. Why do Filipinos thrive despite the adversities? Read on some of the business signs found throughout the Philippines and you’ll see why.
1. BEAUTY PARLOR in San Juan City: “CUT & FACE”
2. WHOLESALER of DUCK EGGS (balot) in Batangas: “STARDUCKS”
3. FAST FOOD eatery in Nueva Ecija: “VIOLYBEE”
4. INTERNET CAFÉ among squatters area in Tondo: “CAFÉ PINDOT” (due excessive touch)
5. LAUNDRY SHOP in University Belt, Manila: “SUMMA CUM LAUNDRY”
6. PETSHOP in Ortigas: “PUSSIES AND BITCHES”
7. PETSHOP in Kamuning: “PAKITA MO PET MO”
8. BAKERY in Quezon City: “BREAD PIT”
9. BANK in Alabang, Muntinlupa: “ALABANK”
10. RESTAURANT in Pampanga: “MEKENI ROGERS”
11. RESTAURANT in Marikina City: “JOHNNY’S PRIDE CHICKEN: FRIED OF MARIKINA”
12. BOXING GYM in Pasay City: “BLOW JAB GYM”
13. TOMBSTONE MAKER in Antipolo City: “LITO LAPIDA”
14. COPY CENTER in Sikatuna Village: “PAKOPYA NI EDGAR” (sounds like the Pinoy musical band)
15. BEERHOUSE in Cavite: CHICK POINT”
16. LAUNDROMAT in Sikatuna: “STAR WASH: ATTACK OF THE CLOTHES”
17. INTERNET CAFÉ in Taguig: "n@kopi@"
18. BEAUTY SALON in Manila: “CURL UP AND DYE”
19. GOTO (rice meal) eatery in Bulacan: “GEE CONGEE”
20. WATER REFILLING STATION in Dapitan: “WA-THIRST”
21. CHICKEN FEEDS Store in Bulacan: “ROBO COCK”
22. SHOE REPAIR shop in Marikina: “DR. SHOE BAGO”
23. SHOE REPAIR store in Commonwealth: “SHOEPERMAN: (we will HEAL you, save your SOLE, and even DYE for you)
24. PET SHOP in Caloocan City: “PETNESS FIRST”
25. FLOWER SHOP in Quezon City: “SUSAN ROSES”
26. TAXICAB Operator: INCOME TAXI”
27. WATCH STORE selling second-hand items: “2ND TIME AROUND”
28. SQUID (pusit) STALL in wet market: “PUSIT TO THE LIMIT”
29. GAY LAWYER’s extension office: “NOTA REPUBLIC”
30. CARPENTER’s ceiling installer home-office: “KISAME STREET”
31. CAR REPAIR shop: “BANGGA KA DAY?”
32. AQUATIC PET STORE in Malolos: “FISH BE WITH YOU”
33. BEAUTY SALON in community with lot of OCW families: “SAUDIA HAIRLINES”
34. BAKERY in Metro: “ANAK NG TINAPAY”
35. RESTO eatery along Mayon Road, Manila: “MAY LISA EATERY”
36. LAUNDRY SHOP: “WASH YOUR PROBLEM”
37. ICE CREAM parlor: “DILA LANG ANG KATAPAT!”
38. CHICHARON stall: “CHICHA HUT”
39. PIZZA STORE in neighborhood: “PIZZA HOT”
40. FISHBALL CART near UST: “EAT MY BALLS”
41. BARBERSHOP in Cagayan De Oro: “PINOY BIG BARBER”
42. RESTO eatery: “LAST SUPPER”
43. PEANUT VENDOR’s cart: “MANI NI PAPA”
44. GYM owned by gay in Malolos: “GAYMANN FITNESS CENTER”
45. PARTY NEEDS store: “BALLOON-BALLOONAN”
46. CHINESE RESTAURANT in Pasig: “LAH FANG”
47. FRESH CHICKEN store owned by woman named Dina who claims “fresh chickens daily”: “DINA FRESH CHICKEN”
48. BAKESHOP with specialty "monay" bread: “TRIMONAY”
49. BEAUTY SALON beside internet café with same owner: “HAIR DOT COMB”
50. RESTAURANT SIGNAGE: “We are open 25 hrs. a day – no lunch/dinner breaks!”
The Filipinos’ propensity for spoofs of popular signs shows no sign of abating. Pinoy humor, even in the most difficult situations always worms its way, and usually ends up softening the impact of what could otherwise be a bad situation.
That is typically Filipino. After all, we are not known as one of the happiest people in the world for nothing. Why do Filipinos thrive despite the adversities? Read on some of the business signs found throughout the Philippines and you’ll see why.
1. BEAUTY PARLOR in San Juan City: “CUT & FACE”
2. WHOLESALER of DUCK EGGS (balot) in Batangas: “STARDUCKS”
3. FAST FOOD eatery in Nueva Ecija: “VIOLYBEE”
4. INTERNET CAFÉ among squatters area in Tondo: “CAFÉ PINDOT” (due excessive touch)
5. LAUNDRY SHOP in University Belt, Manila: “SUMMA CUM LAUNDRY”
6. PETSHOP in Ortigas: “PUSSIES AND BITCHES”
7. PETSHOP in Kamuning: “PAKITA MO PET MO”
8. BAKERY in Quezon City: “BREAD PIT”
9. BANK in Alabang, Muntinlupa: “ALABANK”
10. RESTAURANT in Pampanga: “MEKENI ROGERS”
11. RESTAURANT in Marikina City: “JOHNNY’S PRIDE CHICKEN: FRIED OF MARIKINA”
12. BOXING GYM in Pasay City: “BLOW JAB GYM”
13. TOMBSTONE MAKER in Antipolo City: “LITO LAPIDA”
14. COPY CENTER in Sikatuna Village: “PAKOPYA NI EDGAR” (sounds like the Pinoy musical band)
15. BEERHOUSE in Cavite: CHICK POINT”
16. LAUNDROMAT in Sikatuna: “STAR WASH: ATTACK OF THE CLOTHES”
17. INTERNET CAFÉ in Taguig: "n@kopi@"
18. BEAUTY SALON in Manila: “CURL UP AND DYE”
19. GOTO (rice meal) eatery in Bulacan: “GEE CONGEE”
20. WATER REFILLING STATION in Dapitan: “WA-THIRST”
21. CHICKEN FEEDS Store in Bulacan: “ROBO COCK”
22. SHOE REPAIR shop in Marikina: “DR. SHOE BAGO”
23. SHOE REPAIR store in Commonwealth: “SHOEPERMAN: (we will HEAL you, save your SOLE, and even DYE for you)
24. PET SHOP in Caloocan City: “PETNESS FIRST”
25. FLOWER SHOP in Quezon City: “SUSAN ROSES”
26. TAXICAB Operator: INCOME TAXI”
27. WATCH STORE selling second-hand items: “2ND TIME AROUND”
28. SQUID (pusit) STALL in wet market: “PUSIT TO THE LIMIT”
29. GAY LAWYER’s extension office: “NOTA REPUBLIC”
30. CARPENTER’s ceiling installer home-office: “KISAME STREET”
31. CAR REPAIR shop: “BANGGA KA DAY?”
32. AQUATIC PET STORE in Malolos: “FISH BE WITH YOU”
33. BEAUTY SALON in community with lot of OCW families: “SAUDIA HAIRLINES”
34. BAKERY in Metro: “ANAK NG TINAPAY”
35. RESTO eatery along Mayon Road, Manila: “MAY LISA EATERY”
36. LAUNDRY SHOP: “WASH YOUR PROBLEM”
37. ICE CREAM parlor: “DILA LANG ANG KATAPAT!”
38. CHICHARON stall: “CHICHA HUT”
39. PIZZA STORE in neighborhood: “PIZZA HOT”
40. FISHBALL CART near UST: “EAT MY BALLS”
41. BARBERSHOP in Cagayan De Oro: “PINOY BIG BARBER”
42. RESTO eatery: “LAST SUPPER”
43. PEANUT VENDOR’s cart: “MANI NI PAPA”
44. GYM owned by gay in Malolos: “GAYMANN FITNESS CENTER”
45. PARTY NEEDS store: “BALLOON-BALLOONAN”
46. CHINESE RESTAURANT in Pasig: “LAH FANG”
47. FRESH CHICKEN store owned by woman named Dina who claims “fresh chickens daily”: “DINA FRESH CHICKEN”
48. BAKESHOP with specialty "monay" bread: “TRIMONAY”
49. BEAUTY SALON beside internet café with same owner: “HAIR DOT COMB”
50. RESTAURANT SIGNAGE: “We are open 25 hrs. a day – no lunch/dinner breaks!”
Singtel Data Plan iphone app prob
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Tawa muna Pinoy!
Street Vendor : "bili na kayo ng relo! gold watch ito!
pag namuti, white gold!
pag huminto stopwatch!"
gf : hu hu hu hu bakit natin ginawa ito? hindi na ako virgin at dalawang beses pa natin ginawa!
bf : ano? isa lang ah?!
gf : bakit, hindi na ba natin uulitin mamaya?!
Couple talking:
wife : hon, paki fix naman ilaw sa labas.
husband : hello!? electrician ba ako?
wife : eh di pkigawa na lang hagdan natin.
husband : hello!? karpintero ba ako?
umalis c husband, pagbalik gawa na lahat ng sira sa
bahay. tinanong niya wife kung sino gumawa ng trabaho.
wife : kasi kanina a man saw me crying, sabi ko dami sira dito sa bahay. so he offered to help in exhange of either sex or bake ako ng cake.
husband : so pnag-bake mo siya ng cake?
wife : hello?! baker ba ako?!
ANG MARRIED LIFE.....
May isang intsik na sa sobrang hilig sa karaoke ay inabot ng 5 am.
Dahil sa takot mabugbog ni misis, nag-text ng:
"HUWAG KA BAYAD RANSOM. NAKATAKAS AKO. UWI NA KO!"
Husband: "Paratina lang tayo away! Maghiwalay na lang tayo!"
Wife: "Sige, maghati tayo ng mga anak!"
Husband: "Akin ang mga guwapo at maganda!"
Wife: "Sus! Pinili pa yung hindi kanya!"
Sa harap ng nursery window;
Friend: Pare, pag laki ng anak mo, am sure magaling mag-drive
Dad: Bakit, pare, malaki ba ang kamay?
Friend: Hindi. Kasi kamukha siya ng driver ninyo!
Husband came home from church, suddenly lifted his wife and carried her.
Wife: Why? Did the Pastor tell you to be romantic like this?
Husband: No! He told me to carry my cross!
Friend: "Wow, pare, ganda ng sapatos mo, ah!"
Husband: "Oo. Surprise gift ng
kumare mo!"
Friend: "Surprise? Ano occassion?"
Husband: "Wala. Nakita ko na lang sa ilalim ng kama namin kagabi!"
Health Advisory: "Beer contains female hormones, and can turn men into women.
After 5 pints.... men become talkative, unreasonable, irritable, cry for nothing, and urinate while sitting!"
WIFE: I'm warning you! Parating na husband ko in 1 hour!
HANDSOME VISITOR: Wala naman akong ginawang masama ah?
WIFE: kaya nga! kung may balak ka, GAWIN MONA!!!
WIFE: Himala! aga mong umuwi ngayon.
HUSBAND: Sunod ko lang utos ng boss ko. Sabi nya "GO TO HELL", kaya ito uwi agad ako..
Wife: Lab, may taning na ang buhay ko. Huling gabi ko na to, let's make love.
Husband: Heh! tumigil ka nga. Maaga pa akong gigising bukas, buti ikaw, hindi na.
HEHEHHE!
Population policies of countries:
China : Stop at 1 child.
Singapore : Stop at 2 children
Phil: STOP AT 4 A.M.!
RUSSIAN: we're 1st in space
USA : we're 1st in the moon
ERAP: we'll be the 1st in the sun
USA : you can't go there, you'll burn
ERAP: we're not stupid, we'll go there at NIGHT!
Ano kadalasan ang sinasabi kapag nautot?
American: Excuse me.
British: Pardon me.
Pinoy: NOT ME!
"SUMPA"
Hindi na makakatikim ng napakasarap na 'Sex' ang huling bumasa nito!
Ayos safe na ako...papayag ka bang IKAW ang huling babasa nito?
hehehe!!!
pag namuti, white gold!
pag huminto stopwatch!"
gf : hu hu hu hu bakit natin ginawa ito? hindi na ako virgin at dalawang beses pa natin ginawa!
bf : ano? isa lang ah?!
gf : bakit, hindi na ba natin uulitin mamaya?!
Couple talking:
wife : hon, paki fix naman ilaw sa labas.
husband : hello!? electrician ba ako?
wife : eh di pkigawa na lang hagdan natin.
husband : hello!? karpintero ba ako?
umalis c husband, pagbalik gawa na lahat ng sira sa
bahay. tinanong niya wife kung sino gumawa ng trabaho.
wife : kasi kanina a man saw me crying, sabi ko dami sira dito sa bahay. so he offered to help in exhange of either sex or bake ako ng cake.
husband : so pnag-bake mo siya ng cake?
wife : hello?! baker ba ako?!
ANG MARRIED LIFE.....
May isang intsik na sa sobrang hilig sa karaoke ay inabot ng 5 am.
Dahil sa takot mabugbog ni misis, nag-text ng:
"HUWAG KA BAYAD RANSOM. NAKATAKAS AKO. UWI NA KO!"
Husband: "Paratina lang tayo away! Maghiwalay na lang tayo!"
Wife: "Sige, maghati tayo ng mga anak!"
Husband: "Akin ang mga guwapo at maganda!"
Wife: "Sus! Pinili pa yung hindi kanya!"
Sa harap ng nursery window;
Friend: Pare, pag laki ng anak mo, am sure magaling mag-drive
Dad: Bakit, pare, malaki ba ang kamay?
Friend: Hindi. Kasi kamukha siya ng driver ninyo!
Husband came home from church, suddenly lifted his wife and carried her.
Wife: Why? Did the Pastor tell you to be romantic like this?
Husband: No! He told me to carry my cross!
Friend: "Wow, pare, ganda ng sapatos mo, ah!"
Husband: "Oo. Surprise gift ng
kumare mo!"
Friend: "Surprise? Ano occassion?"
Husband: "Wala. Nakita ko na lang sa ilalim ng kama namin kagabi!"
Health Advisory: "Beer contains female hormones, and can turn men into women.
After 5 pints.... men become talkative, unreasonable, irritable, cry for nothing, and urinate while sitting!"
WIFE: I'm warning you! Parating na husband ko in 1 hour!
HANDSOME VISITOR: Wala naman akong ginawang masama ah?
WIFE: kaya nga! kung may balak ka, GAWIN MONA!!!
WIFE: Himala! aga mong umuwi ngayon.
HUSBAND: Sunod ko lang utos ng boss ko. Sabi nya "GO TO HELL", kaya ito uwi agad ako..
Wife: Lab, may taning na ang buhay ko. Huling gabi ko na to, let's make love.
Husband: Heh! tumigil ka nga. Maaga pa akong gigising bukas, buti ikaw, hindi na.
HEHEHHE!
Population policies of countries:
China : Stop at 1 child.
Singapore : Stop at 2 children
Phil: STOP AT 4 A.M.!
RUSSIAN: we're 1st in space
USA : we're 1st in the moon
ERAP: we'll be the 1st in the sun
USA : you can't go there, you'll burn
ERAP: we're not stupid, we'll go there at NIGHT!
Ano kadalasan ang sinasabi kapag nautot?
American: Excuse me.
British: Pardon me.
Pinoy: NOT ME!
"SUMPA"
Hindi na makakatikim ng napakasarap na 'Sex' ang huling bumasa nito!
Ayos safe na ako...papayag ka bang IKAW ang huling babasa nito?
hehehe!!!
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